


Scarlett's dreams and the silent Winter

by TheGreenHuntress109



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-01
Updated: 2016-04-12
Packaged: 2018-05-10 22:08:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5602780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGreenHuntress109/pseuds/TheGreenHuntress109
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After escaping Hydra, both the Winter soldier and fellow brainwashee run from the organisation. Katherine aka the Scarlett assassin decides that James Barnes will be the perfect attack dog to protect her on her journey to find out who she is.<br/>Unknown to both, they have known each other far longer than they suspect.</p>
<p>Death, destruction and all the good stuff await as they head to find the good Captain Rogers and find out why they both feel a need to protect him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1 - Burn't photographs

Smoke curled up from the rusty, metal bin.  
Each spark that lit up the dark abandoned warehouse assured the woman stoking the flames now and then, that the documents she had thrown in were being etched from history. She curled her lips in what was a rarely practised smile; not that she would remember if she had smiled before, but from what she did remember this was a rare sight. 

She finally sat on the dusty blankets, she had pilfered from the few boxes left when she was sure the paper was eviscerated; the blankets didn't hold much for warmth but it was more than she had before.   
Before was hazy, but from what she knew it had been horrific.  
Flashes of a metal chair and black clad men holding her down had plagued her nights. She knew she had been an assassin, a good one at that, she could still hear the voices of her victims as they screamed for mercy. These nights when the dead wouldn't allow her sleep, she wouldn't cry for those she wronged, it was weakness in the eyes of her captors. She would replace the sadness with emptiness. It didn't make her feel better having to push aside her feelings, but it didn't make it worse; and that was all she could ask for.  
Having hardly slept, this was when she found she didn't need a full seven hours.

Though, on the rare occasion she didn't have a nightmare she would dream of two men. One was small and sickly with blue puppy eyes and almost gold hair. This one was called Stevie.   
The second was tall with watery blue eyes, brown hair messy from the wind and smile brighter than the sun. This one she called Jamie.

This had been in her file too. These two men apparently existed and was close to her, though they were only talked about briefly and referred to as Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes.  
The documents she had stolen from her old facility somewhere up in Russia had been of her. With her memory being so short, with chunks of her life eradicated, she had gathered the Intel before she escaped. She had been known as the Scarlett assassin while they had her, but the file said her name was Katherine Warren.  
Apparently she had no other siblings and lived with her mother in Brooklyn after travelling over seas from England. Her father was unknown, but was believed to be the reason her mother moved.  
Clipped to the file there had been two pictures, both of her. 

One was dated 1939 and in black and white. In it was the two men she dreamed about, with who she assumed was her in the middle of them. This girl was laughing at something Jamie had said by the look of it. Her eyes gazed at him with a twinkle of joy in them, curled hair messed by an unseen wind and ever the picture of youth. Her right arm curled around Jamie's middle because of the height difference, but Stevie was short enough that she could drape an arm over his shoulders. She seemed happy. This girl was light and laughter.

The second picture was a dead eyed woman glaring at the camera. Colour captured the greasy, long blond hair pulled back in a tight ponytail. Her pale skin seemed ghostly from the cameras light, and held the image of a woman who had seen hell. This was the last terrifying image targets saw before they died screaming.  
There was no joy in this picture, just pure hate and suffering.

Suddenly a cold breeze blew through the area and sent her unevenly cut, short blond hair in to her eyes. Katherine huffed in annoyance - her hair needed to be cut again- as she bolted for cover.   
It would be obvious to whoever's even footsteps echoed off the wall, that someone lived here. Katherine guessed it couldn't be helped, what with the trash can filled with burned paper – fresh ash, a dead give away on how long she had been there- and the dusty blankets on the ground.

She slunk in the shadows as her pursuer stopped his pace. She could feel when the air thrummed with tension.  
Katherine shifted in the dark to see black combat gear, a memory flashed in her minds eye and almost made her growl out loud. This could be a problem.  
If he was with 'them' then she had to leave immediately.

Katherine shifted slowly, as to not make much noise, when a voice rumbled and stopped her in her tracks.  
“Name, code and intent.”   
She cursed mentally at being found out. She was not going back and she was definitely not answering the voice. It was most likely a ploy to get her to reveal her position.  
Something nagged at her brain though; it was like she should know this voice, like he should mean something to her.   
Katherine shook her head. This was the time to either surrender or run, and she was not going back. Ever!

 

With her faith all in the serum forced upon her, Katherine darted for the door with the intent to escape or die trying.  
The stranger dropped instantly to the ground, foot shot out to trip her up. Katherine hardly had time to hop over the obstruction and, in her panic miscalculated her balance upon landing. With her momentum still travelling forward the sudden yank at her hoodie barley stopped her from going face first into the ground. The relief that came with this was sort lived when she was swung by the same hand; Katherine flew in an arc before her back smacked the concrete warehouse floor. The hoodie had choked her as she was swung and left her coughing and desperate for air.  
Katherine rolled to the side; her gasp of pain from what she assumed was broken ribs, were drowned out by the metallic tink of a metal hand smashing the ground her face had been.   
She kicked him, this sent him off balance as she scrambled to her feet.

Metal arm?

Metal arm. 

Metal arm!

Katherine's eyes widen a fraction before she took off for the door. She knew who this was, and if she wanted to live she would get out of there, fast.

Suddenly she was tackled to the ground, her struggling did nothing once the metal arm clamped around her throat. “Name, code and intent.” He growled in her face.  
Brown strands tickled her face as she stared into equally blue eyes. Her mind brought up all the information she needed for this man.   
Winter soldier.  
Asset.  
Extremely dangerous.   
“Scarlett assassin, Code 8924821.....Intent. To live.” That was all the warning he got before Katherine had contorted her body enough to reach the pocket knife in her combat boot; in one graceful arc the knife had bitten into his cheek and was successful in it's mission to stun the soldier. His grip loosened enough for a solid kick to send him flying into the air.  
Katherine took her chance and propelled herself towards the exit. Each step bring her closer to freedom; a glance behind her warned her enough to duck and roll as the soldier tried again to tackle her, this caused the soldier to tumble in her way.

“Weapon, stand down. If you and the asset give yourselves up voluntarily, we won't hurt you.” The echoey bounce of the megaphone vibrated her sensitive eardrums -it was irritating- from the tactical team she hadn't noticed. It seemed her fight with the asset had distracted her enough to not hear the hydra goons sneak up.   
With a curse she ducked back inside.   
Winter seemed to have the same idea, as he commando rolled behind a crate near the entrance. They were surrounded and a chopper had been called in, this was where the man was shouting at them.

So it seemed the Winter soldier had defected, like her.  
He wasn't safe.  
Something akin to kinship sparked, but Katherine soon stamped that out. The Soldier was without a handler and evidently confused. She could see it in his eyes.  
This could be the start of a great partnership, if she could guarantee the Soldier won't kill her in her sleep. He would be added protection until she reached her goal and as secure enough to drop him. Yeah, that could work.

The woman slid her pocket knife over to the Soldier; the soft, comforting scrape of metal drew the Soldier''s attention. “Winter, I can help you get out of this. I will help you to outrun and evade these people.” the Soldier glanced at the people still shouting outside, and she swore there was fear on his face.  
“Winter, I'll help you. But you have to protect me and travel with me, at least until I get to my destination.” Katherine made sure her face was open and honest, lest he think she were lying. He gave a huffed sigh but picked up the knife.  
Katherine smiled, the sign of trust accepted and proceeded to inch towards the wooden panel to her left that would easily come away.   
She nodded towards the men “Cover fire.” she stated simply, as she had noticed the small gun on his back. 

Winter stowed the pocket knife in his own boot – great minds apparently thought alike – and gave a swift nod.

If Katherine could sneak on the to the copter, apprehend the copter or in the very least salvage supplies such as ammo and guns, they should be fine.   
Katherine steeled herself, “Go.” she whispered before Winter had all the attention and gun fire in his direction.  
That's when she pulled the loose panel off. 

Here goes everything.


	2. See a soldier, pick him up. Hopefully you'll have some luck

Not having a weapon should have made Katherine's job harder. On the contrary, it just made it messier.  
She could taste the coppery tang of the blood from when she bit that last soldier; he had been frozen in fear when The Scarlett assassin had dealt with the first five soldiers, each neck snapped perfectly like twigs.  
It had momentarily stunned her when her first reaction to the last soldier had been to bite him; the blood had spurted down her front, bathing her in warmth while the body convulsed. Even after death it was struggling.  
It had left her motionless when her actions finally caught up with her mind. How could she so readily rip a mans throat out, and with her teeth no less?  
She then realised she was further from the girl she wanted to be in those photos. She wasn't light and laughter.  
She was a monster.

Katherine had barley spotted her would be attacker too late, and if it hadn't been for the winter soldier quickly shooting the man, then she would have been dead. Ok well not dead, but inconveniently injured. She gave a salute to the man, but he ignored it and continued to dwindle the soldiers on his side.   
Katherine used the pile of bodies at a stepping ladder before she sprang into the air. The helicopter was retreating along with what was left of the soldiers; Katherine barley caught the copters landing bars as it veered away, tight grip denting the metal.   
The copter was still low to the ground, the pilot trying to shake the woman off. Katherine gave them a growl and was ready to launch herself up......

But Winter had reached out with his metal arm and easily pulled her off.

Katherine jumped from his hold before her feet touched the ground; she ducked and rolled away while snatching back her pocket knife from his boot. Her body crouched low and sprung tight, ready for an attack.  
What was he doing?  
Was he betraying her so soon?  
Dully she felt something..... something like......Hurt? Yes, she felt hurt at his betrayal.

“What are you doing?” She growled out at the surprisingly relaxed man. His once dull eyes now held amusement; his lips fighting to stay straight and he huffed at her.   
“Helping.” he stated before moving to loot the dead bodies, eyes always on Katherine.   
Katherine relaxed and stood not quite catching on.   
Winter shrugged “You would have gotten yourself killed.”   
Katherine shook her head, she knew she was capable. His doubt irked her for some reason.

Her hands ached from holding on to the helicopter, so it was no surprise when her hand holding the knife twitched and forced her to drop it. Winter didn't laugh at her out right, but she got the distinct feeling he would have in a different life.   
Katherine scowled and swiped the pocket knife up again to slide into her boot, “You got a name?” She asked making her way to a body and rifling through the pockets. All she came up with was a lighter and a family photo.  
Guilt stabbed at her heart when she saw the two girls hanging off the arms of the man she murdered. Katherine just added that to the slowly growing pile of guilt she was collecting; after finding out who she had been working for, it sickened her.   
“Asset.” 

Katherine looked up at him, “That's not a name.” she said cocking her head, “everyone has a name, like me. I'm Katherine Warren, apparently.”  
Winter shrugged, “If I had one then I don't remember.” he hefted three dead bodies on to his shoulder and carried them to the nearby brush to at least hide the bodies. Katherine reached for Winter's shoulder (as if it was natural for her to touch so casually, which it certainly was not). Winter twisted and caught her wrist, Scarlett responded in kind with sharp nails digging into the flesh in his wrist. The left hand had clenched but had not moved yet.

Katherine gave a strained smile “Well, then I'm going to call you Jamie until you either remember, or pick a name.” His hand loosened, eyes recognising something in her.  
Katherine didn't know why, but the name fit. He had the same eyes, maybe more saddened but the same as the man in her dreams. 

“We should leave.” He stated as he gathered the few things he found and hid them on his person. Obviously he didn't want to comment on his new name, she could respect that. And even if he wasn't happy with it he'd tell her.  
With an odd sensation she had found something she'd been looking for, she darted back into the warehouse. Katherine found the back pack she was prepared to leave in her desperation to not get caught. Now she thought about it, she was happy she didn't; the bag contained fake documents like pass ports and such. Without it it would have been hard to cross Russian borders to get to America.

Katherine breezed past him “Hope you know how to drive.” she said before taking off at a brisk march.


	3. Scarlet memories coloured red, white and blue

“Here.” Jamie said as he pushed a coat on to Katherine's shoulders. The unexpected contact made her tense, and it seemed like Jamie wasn't exactly comfortable with it either. As soon as the coat was around her shoulders his hands shoot right back to his side, she gave him a questioning look.  
Jamie pointed to her blood soaked hoodie; the crusted blood stank of death and had soaked through to her thin shirt, which did little against the Russian air. Winter here was harsh, as was evident by the freezing blood. Katherine hated the cold.   
It wasn't that she could really feel it, because she

 

“Thanks.” She muttered, as she pulled the coat closer. Lucky she had a spare shirt in her backpack, but the jeans would have to be washed in a nearby restroom. Katherine looked at her jeans, inspecting it to see if it was worth stopping to clean; there was only a couple dots despite the waterfall that had been unleashed from the man she killed.

She should be fine.  
They walked for a while, neither spoke and Jamie followed her through the streets until they found a car least likely to be taken notice of.   
Most people made mistakes when on the run. They would steal a car that they would have wanted could they afford it, but Katherine's wants had been beaten out of her (it was only recently she found she could want something) and so she could make the logical choice. The car she honed in on was a beaten old, Honda civic; it looked to have been white at some point but the dust and dirt clung to the hunk of scrape on wheels.

Despite its' dismal appearance, it seemed reliable and working.

 

Katherine gestured to Jamie “Be a gentleman and break in for me. I'll be changing.” She walked towards the restroom. Jamie gave a grunt in acknowledgement and set about his work.  
As soon as she entered the room she sighed. The half smashed mirror on the opposite wall revealed the blood covering her lower face.  
Her face went pale, blond hair fell into her eyes and made her look insane. Katherine walked towards the sink, the tap needed a bit of a strength to turn because of the rust but she did it. The hot water seemed to not be working as she splashed the freezing water on her face. Blood dripped on to the rust speckled sink, marring it more.  
With a blank stare, Katherine striped out of the soiled clothes and changed into a blue t shirt.   
The T shirt was obviously a man's, as it was massive on her and one side slipped off her shoulder.

She'd need to get more clothes soon.

 

Suddenly the memory of a small boy slipped in to her mind.

 

“ _Buck, stop.” The small blond complained , but his laughter betrayed him. Katherine was there standing next to the boy. She felt angry. Not at the boy, but someone else._

“ _Come on Stevie, you need to stay warm. This is the best way.” The boy Stevie had called Buck said. A towel was in his hands and he was trying to rub at the boys hair, but Stevie was struggling for all he was worth._

 

“ _How dare they.” Katherine was saying, pacing back and forth. “Jamie,we need to stay with Stevie at all times. We can't let those boys get him again.” she told him sternly, while slapping her hand with her fist. Jamie raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything, like he knew his input didn't matter._

_Stevie shook his head once Jamie stopped rubbing his hair, “Kathy, it's fine...”_

“ _Fine!” Katherine shrieked at him. Stevie flinched and Katherine softened her voice, “Stevie, they threw you the river.” Stevie shivered at that, but shrugged. The thought that this boy had a death wish flitted through her mind._

 

“ _Will you two stop it. Here punk.” Jamie said as he pulled a large shirt over the younger boys head. It dwarfed him, making his seem smaller than he was.  
Katherine gave a soft smile to the two boys._

_Stevie grumbled._

 

“ _Thanks. Jerk.”_

 

Katherine smiled. This one was a better memory, another to file away in the 'happy' pile.

 

Quickly she stashed the bloody clothes under the sink and exited the bathroom. Katherine expected the car to be gone with the super soldier in tow.

Well she was right.

 

There was a rectangle of dry ground where the car had been, the snow surrounding had foot steps leading to where the driver door was. Katherine sighed as she swung her backpack over her shoulder, the coat Jamie had given her slipped on before she opened the door to leave.   
“Well what did you expect?” She whispered to herself before taking off down the street.

 

It wasn't long before she found that crappy coloured car she had asked Jamie to steal. Well he did steal it. Twice.  
The car was parked outside of a convenience store, one of those shitty ones where all the fungus in the world comes to breed in its bathroom. Katherine gave a disgusted snort and tried the handle of the passenger side.  
Surprisingly it opened. She was not impressed if he expected to not have this re-stolen, and how ironic would that be? Maybe three was the magic number and no one else would steal the car, who knew.

But it would serve him right if she took the car and left. Leaving her like that, and after she saved him. Kinda.

 

She finally decided to slip into the passenger back seat and lay down, just as he came out of the shop. This is what he gets.

 

Somewhere in her mind, scarlet knew this was childish but Katherine thought it was brilliant.

 


	4. Like looking into a mirror, in his eyes

“Hello again, snowflake.” Katherine said as soon as Jamie had started the car. Jamie didn't move an inch, which told her that he knew she was there. That rankled her.  
Jamie glanced in the mirror, brow raised at her which she responded with a shrug. “Didn't think I'd find you, huh?”  
Jamie threw a sandwich box at her without so much as blinking at her, which she caught and plced in the seat next to her. She looked at the passenger front seat where there was a plastic bag full off food and there was hoodie poking out of it. Katherine's interest peaked at the hoodie, she liked hoodies now especially if they were baggy. 

Jamie finally spoke again, “I got us food, and you needed another layer.”   
Katherine felt guilty again, it appeared her cynical thinking had misjudged this man. Her voice was soft when she reached for the hoodie, “How'd you get the money?” she asked pulling the coat Jamie gave her off and slipping the hoodie on, then she swapped the bag from the front to the back and squeezed her small frame enough to sit in the front. Jamie glanced at her but didn't seem annoyed at her switch, “Hydra.”  
Katherine stiffened and let out a tiny hiss at the name of the people who had turned her into a weapon. The people who degraded her again and again, just so they got what they wanted. They had lied and twisted her mind so many times she didn't know where Katherine started and the Scarlett assassin ended. 

“Where are we heading?” He asked, Katherine shook her head to clear the dark cobwebs that agency had left in her head. She leaned her head against the window and watched the orange shading the sky blend with the darker blues of the night; the sun was sinking down in the marsh of sandy colours.   
Her shoulders relaxed as a puff of warm breath steamed the picturesque scene from her view. Finally she realised she hadn't answered his question, “Brooklyn. America.” she answered with a large yawn at the end. The day had worn her out (what with near dying) and the sleepless nights she had, had equalled being bone tired now.  
She was determined to keep her eyes open though.

Jamie glanced at her, expressionless. It reminded Katherine of how she use to look, how she still sometimes looked when not pretending to be normal. It had left her with an uncomfortable feeling in her chest.  
“Sleep.” Katherine tensed at the command in his voice. Her programming warring with her developing personality as she both tried to follow and go against the order.   
“No.” she growled. “Don't order me.”Jamie didn't move, not even a twitch. He just pulled the car nice and calmly to the road side and stopped. Katherine watched as he turned to her.  
They just starred at each other for the longest time, long enough for a normal person to get uncomfortable.

“You need sleep.” He stated.  
Katherine straightened and tried to make herself bigger despite her small stature even when standing. Her body was deathly still, trying not to betray anything through movement, “So do you.” She deflected, “You could sleep and I drive.” she said as if it was that simple.  
Jamie shook his head, “So you can kill me while I sleep. No.”  
Katherine wondered why he had come with her if he didn't trust her, then she wondered why she wanted him to. She didn't trust people as a rule, didn't work with anyone and yet here she was.  
In a car with the most dangerous thing to come out of Hydra.

She raised and eyebrow at him, “And you think me stupid enough to not think the same.” she gave him a twisted grin that was suppose to be an amused smile.  
“Fine.” Jamie said patently. “Then no one drives until the other sleeps.”  
….......

It had taken a few hours after when her eyes drooped and her head tilted forward into an exhausted sleep. As per usual it wasn't a pleasant rest, she woke with a little jolt and panicked when she heard distressed noises.  
She turned her eyes to the other assassin who had managed to fall asleep. And by the look of it the rest was as restful as her own. At the look of fear on his sleeping face, Katherine's expression softened; she knew how nightmares trapped you in the depths of sleep, where you can't defend yourself. 

With practiced stealth, she leaned over to gently wake him.  
Jamie's eyes flew open, still blurred by sleep, and still in the throes of his nightmares. With his metal hand he grabbed for her throat, Scarlett reacted by wedging her left fist into his reaching hand. This effectively created a barrier between his hand and her neck, his hand squeezed and she winced.   
Katherine pushed Scarlett aside and reached her hand (The one currently not being squeezed to death)out in front of her slightly, palm up to show she had no weapons. Jamie didn't respond, his hand still as tight as it was before; the only thing she could be thankful for was that he was crushing her hand and not her throat.  
“Jamie?” His eye twitched. “Jamie, it's me Katherine. You're safe.” The hand lessened in pressure.  
Katherine started to hum a song she could barley remember the name of, but knew the melody and lyrics to.

“Over in Killarney  
Many years ago,  
Me Mother sang a song to me  
In tones so sweet and low.  
Just a simple little ditty,  
In her good old Irish way,  
And I'd give the world if she could sing  
That song to me this day.”

The hand loosened some more until it fell into his lap; his eyes were still distant but it no longer held a murderous glint. He swayed a little to her singing and she thanked whatever entity that had saved so many times, that she knew this song. She patted his hand and he latched on to it with his flesh one.   
He smiled a smile so happy and carefree, that she forgot he was the winter soldier for a second. She smiled back at him as genuinely as he had her, she felt younger and closer to that girl she was in a distant memory. His low voice sang the chorus, "Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, Too-ra-loo-ra-li,  
Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, hush now, don't you cry!  
Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, Too-ra-loo-ra-li,  
Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ral, that's an Irish lullaby." 

Silence filled the car. The moon hung behind them and illuminated their faces; no sound could be heard and the sky was clear. It truly was a beautiful night.

Katherine had never really had someone to talk with. Was not allowed to talk about things that weren't 'The mission'. Now she had someone to talk with, she wasn't quite sure what to talk about. Though the obvious topic was one she didn't want to use. But maybe talking about it with him might help him in some way, to share the burden or something.  
“Wanna talk about it?”  
“No.”  
“Ok.” Katherine looked at her hands. Jamie seemed uncomfortable from where she could see tiny aborted ticks; like one hand kept going halfway to his head then stopped before he dropped it, and another was the way his metal hand fiddled with the frayed edge of his combat shirt.   
On a side note they needed to get him new clothes and a haircut.

She rubbed at the bruises on her hand already fading, and wondered why she didn't feel like running.   
He had hurt her, he was dangerous, he was broken, but..... then so was she. And she had hurt people before too, he hurt her by accident.  
She hurt people on purpose. 

He was like her, and she felt for him. Felt emotions she thought long dead, and it didn't require her trying. With him it came naturally. And she had only been with him a day.  
If they were both broken then maybe they could fix each other, or at least fill the gaps. She wasn't sure she could ever be the girl she was, nor could he be the man he was.  
They didn't trust easy and that led to the big question. Why did he come with her so readily.  
“Jamie?” she said softly. He raised his head in acknowledgement and dared to look her in the eye. She was glad for this.  
Katherine gave him a weak smile, “Why did you chose to follow me. I mean, I could have been lying. But you choose to believe me. Why?”  
Jamie gave a shrug and turned to face the front. How he had scrunched himself up like that, she'd never know.

He started the car before looking at her again, “I knew you. Like I knew the man on the bridge.”  
Katherine tilted her head, so he felt it too. But who was this man on the bridge? And if Jamie knew him, then did that mean she did too?   
“Who's the man on the bridge?”  
“I don't know.” He growled in frustration, “But I intend to find out. And we just so happen to be going in the right direction.”

He gave her a dark grin, before driving in to still darkened road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So they still haven't really moved much, but Steve is mentioned. They're kind of trusting each other now, though not that much.   
> Anyway I'd like to say thanks for the support and that comments are welcome. I'd like to know how people like Katherine, or Buckster for that matter. 
> 
> Laters - Huntress :)


	5. Puzzle pieces and co-pilots

Jamie drove most of the time, and Katherine suspected it was his form of making choices, staying in control if you will. She was fine with that, he took part in conversation which although, was only sometimes, he always had something to add.

Their drive from Perm to Pozhva, which only took four hours give or take a few minuets, she had found that she could like or dislike things.

Things Katherine liked included a lot of food and a limited list of music, but she found she could add Jamie to that list. She found his sense of humour funny, it was the same as hers, and that every small upturn of his lips made her feel accomplished in a way she never had. Those twitches of his lips were hard won, and took a while for him to relax enough to allow even that.

 

She smiled as they pulled up outside a weather stained hotel; it looked dingy, colour all but gone and the vines looked like they were trying to choke the life out of the building.

Jamie glanced at her and raised an eyebrow in question, Katherine shrugged at him and proceeded to get out of the car with Jamie following.

Katherine smiled at the young man at the desk, seductively she leaned over the desk towards the man. The boy looked nineteen with a slim body, styled black hair and big blue expressive eyes.

The boy looked at her and smiled, “What can I do for you?” he asked polity.

Katherine gave a smile when his eyes landed on Jamie and the boy stood a little straighter. Jamie stood behind her and held all their things, which she admittedly should have helped with.   
  


“We'd like a room for two nights.” Was Jamie's blunt answer. His shoulders had tensed up again since they relaxed in the car.

The boy nodded, “Single or.....” he asked as he gestured to them.   
Katherine laughed, “I wouldn't mind sharing a bed with my gay best friend, but I tend to take up the whole bed.” She pretended to look guilty as she continued, “Last time I literally kicked him off the bed.”

The boy , with a laugh, slipped on a flirty smile and continued looking at Jamie as he said, “So two singles, got it. My names Vadim. Here's your keys.” He lay the keys on Katherine's open hand.

“Just call if you need anything.” He told them with a wink at Jamie.

 

Katherine called a thanks as they found their room. It was on the second floor, room 19.

Jamie steeped close behind her as she opened the door, “Why did you tell him I was gay?”

The question didn't sound angry, just questioning.

Katherine surveyed the room, which admittedly was rather nice. There were two beds, not big but comfortable, which had been pressed head board first against the right side wall. One was near the door while the other had been pushed towards the window, the nearest to the window was a hazard. Katherine knew that a sniper could easily take whoever was sleeping there, out.

Rich red covers, that seemed less stained than she would have thought they'd be, encased the bed.

 

There was a coffee table in the centre of the room and a small TV sat on a chest of drawers in the corner, pushed at an angle so both beds had a view. White wallpaper blanketed the walls and were as stained as she had expected the bed to have been.   
Frayed cream carpets softened any footsteps and Katherine couldn't help but this room needed a better colour scheme.

 

She threw herself onto the bed closest to the door, she bounced slightly and shrugged. “He's gay, eyes dilated when he saw you; which means he wants you slash likes you. If he believes he has a chance with you then he'll go out of his way to make our stay comfortable.”

Jamie had closed the door at this point and stood directly in front of her. Katherine hated the position they were in, her craning to look at his face and feeling small having to look up at him (not that she didn't have to do that when they were standing, but this felt more humiliating.)

 

“Now will you please sit down before I break my neck.” she told him irritably, she felt a little better when he sat down on the other bed and dumped the bags on the floor.

Katherine reached over the small space from her bed to his and grabbed her backpack. When she pulled out a pair of scissors Jamie tensed, “We need to cut your hair.” she told him walking towards the small bathroom near the door, “Hydra'll recognise you if we don't. Oh and I'll have to find some hair dye too.” As she said this she disappeared into the bathroom and almost ran into Jamie when she popped her head out. He stood in the doorway and stepped back to insure that she didn't hurt herself, Katherine just smiled at him. “ I'm thinking black.”

 

She continued to chatter as he sat on the toilet seat, in was nice just to talk and not be punished for it. Jamie's shoulders relaxed at the idle chat, she talked about what her favourite colour was now that she knew, and what she wanted to find out. Through out this, she cut his hair and parted it to the right. It was shorter round the the sides and back but longer on top, like how the real James and Stevie had it.

Katherine smiled as she brushed aside the hair on his shoulder's and tried sweeping up the hair from the floor with her hands. Jamie stood at looked at himself in the mirror, “You like it?” She asked and stood from where she had thrown the hair in the small waste basket.

“I do.”Jamie turned with an actual smile, though small, and Katherine almost dropped the scissors.

 

How had she not seen it?

How could this slip by her?

 

Jamie's smile dropped, “What is it? Kathy?”

 

…..............

 

 

“ _Hey, you sure you know what you're doing?” Jamie asked. A towel was wrapped around his shoulders as he stared at the bathroom mirror, every now and them he blew a long piece of hair out of his face. The three of them looked no more than fifteen._

_Stevie sat on the edge of the bathtub and grinned at him._

“ _Kathy?” Jamie had asked with apprehension._

_Katherine waved a hand at him as if offended, her nose in the air in fake indignation. Stevie stifled a giggled, but Katherine had heard and winked at him._

 

“ _Of course, Stevie's Ma taught me. Now you want it all off, right?” She laughed when Jamie wrapped arms around his head and gave her a dirty look.  
“Aw, but Buck. “ Stevie said with a smile, “I'm sure the dames would fall all over themselves for -”_

“ _A chrome-dome.” Both Stevie and Katherine said at the same time and laughed._

_Jamie pretended to grumble, but she could see his smile in the mirror. Katherine readied the scissors as Jamie said, “I don't know why I'm friends with you two.”_

_Katherine started snipping at the hair by his ears, as they were bothering her the most. Steve shrugged from his place on the tub, tiny shoulder's almost poking him in the ears. “Cause I'm the one with the brains and you got the looks.” Stevie suggested._

 

_Katherin laughed, “Well he's too doll dizzy to use those brains.” she said poking Jamie in the head with her finger, which he retaliated with a very adult 'shut up'.  
“I think you got it wrong Stevie. You got those big blue's that get you outta trouble. Jamie got the gift of the gab. And I pull both your asses outta trouble. Obviously I'm the pretty one with the brains.” She flipped her hair after finishing the back of Jamie's hair, to which Jamie gawfed and Stevie raised an eyebrow._

“ _Hey, don't let my sister's hear ya swearin. Ma'll give me a good hidin.” Jamie warned in a whisper. Katherine gave him a apologetic smile in the mirror. Jamie shook his head and continued with their earlier conversation,”Anyway, I must have those brains. I don't just go for any dumb Dora.”_

 

_Stevie gave laugh while Katherine gave a snort. “Not just any dumb Dora? Please.” Stevie said in disbelief. Katherine had to stop cutting his hair to be sure she didn't cut him with her body shaking with uncontrolled laughter._

“ _What about Lucy? She was thicker than two planks of wood.” Stevie points out. Jamie frowns and opens his mouth as if to say something, but Katherine gets there first._

“ _And you're still holdin a torch for Allison.” She teased and snipped the last piece of long hair with a flourish._

_Stevie made a face, “She's even dumber than Lucy.” he said in disbelief. Jamie seemed to make the decision to not answer that._

 

“ _Do you like it?” Katherine asks when Jamie stands and brushes the hair from his shoulders. Katherine twiddles her thumbs and nervously twirled them together. Jamie turned and smiled at her.  
“I do. Kay, Kathy, Kitty, kit. I love it.”_

_Katherine rolled her eyes at all the stupid nicknames, but her smile spoke volumes._

 

….........

 

“We grew up together. You're James, James 'Bucky' Barnes.” She gasped out and a huge smile. “I found one of my co-pilots.”

Jamie's face contorted through about five different emotions, until it settled on surprise, “Kathy..... Your favourite colour's blue and you can't sing for toffee.”   
  


Katherine just smiled. One puzzle piece was in her grasp, now to find out who Stevie is and what happened to him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Doll dizzy - girl crazy
> 
> Chrome dome- bald man
> 
> Dumb dora- stupid girl


	6. Winters view

Winter watched as the smile fell from Katherine's face, and winter wondered what he did to wipe that from her mouth. She looked better when she was openly happy.  
His subconscious told him that was how she use to look. Since they had met his mind had been showing him glimpses of long blond hair and blue eyes, sometimes it was companied by dreams of a scrawny twelve year old girl as she pulled another skinny kid off of the ground.   
But that girl was always smiling.

Katherine always looked sad; her blue eyes would fill with this look of guilt and sorrow, as if she had lost so much. Winter could relate (even though he couldn't remember), that was probably why he trusted her easier than he normally would. Although, this wasn't the only reason he felt at ease (at least less jumpy) around her. Kathy, as he had taken to call her in his head, talked to him like a human; she even went as far as giving him a name when they first met, and starting conversations with him. 

For that he was grateful.  
Which was a novelty for him. He was so use to only feeling anger or emptiness, always one or the other. There was no time for him to have any other feelings, and feeling more than one was overwhelming. 

Because of what she did he felt more human and the memories that leaked through held a happier note, just as The man on the bridge (as he calls Steve because he can't quite call him that yet. He guesses it's because of guilt.) had brought up an image of a little guy who wouldn't back down.

Katherine pulled at a piece of her choppy fringe and sat on the bath tub's edge, the image of her sat there felt so familiar and yet he got the feeling something was missing. “Sorry.” She said not looking at him, her eyes glued to the floor by his feet. What could she possibly be sorry for? She hadn't done anything wrong.  
“I.....I just.” Kathy sighed, but finally looked up at him, “I just wanted to piece myself together enough before I tried finding you or Stevie.” She gave a bitter smile as her shoulders sagged in defeat, “I wanted to be....I dunno, me I guess. The other me, before me.” She frowned at him. “Does that make any sense?” she asked and Winter surprised himself when he gave her a tender smile.

He reached down to lift her head when it dropped , again, to look at the floor. “Yes. You are not the same, but neither am I.” Kathy looked up at him, her eyes were guarded as if the soft words and comforting gestures were a trick. Honestly, he wouldn't be surprised if Hydra had done that to her as a way to mistrust anyone but the organisation. But he saw a small spark of.....longing. Longing to be comforted, to take his words at face value, rather than having to sift through them to see if he had an ulterior motive. 

Kathy leaned away from Winter and he could see the walls had gone up at full capacity. He knew he shouldn't have said anything, after all emotions weren't his area. Winter pulled his hand back and let it fall to his side, he had a thought that maybe he should refer to himself as Jamie in his head. Because as lacking as he was in dealing with feelings, it didn't mean he was wrong about not being the same. Just as she was not the girl she was, which he barley remembered anyway, he was also not the man he was, nor was he the winter soldier anymore. He'd been mentally calling himself Winter since he saved The man on the bridge.

Silence blanketed the room and if Jamie – he liked the sound of the name, seemed right - had not been trained not to move he would have shifted awkwardly.  
Suddenly Jamie remembered in her chattering that she wanted to make a list of things to do. It seemed like a good way to gather intel on how to fit in, and some of the things she wanted to do Jamie actually wouldn't mind trying.  
“You mentioned a list.” He stated, back to his usual short sentences. Kathy blinked at him and moved to her bed, it occurred to him that maybe he should clarify. “You said there were things you wanted to try. There was a list.”

….....

Two hours later they sat on their beds with a piece of paper and pen each, curtsy of the hotel drawers. Jamie read through the three things he had written:

1) Find the man on the bridge  
2) Find out more about the world  
3) Dance

It wasn't much and he honestly didn't know what he wanted to do now. For so long it was complete the mission, then it was survive. He never really gave much thought to what he would do now he was out, dancing had just popped up when he was writing so he put that down.  
He chanced a look up at the woman sat far away from him on her bed; her shoulders were hunched over to both cover her work and help scrunch herself further against the head board, the pencil in her hand almost smoked with how much she was writing.

Though, her body had put up physical defences her eyes held delight. They danced with with life that hadn't been there before, almost childlike in its glee.  
It was......nice.  
The silence and companionable presence of another person, someone he had fallen asleep near and hadn't been woken to a knife to his throat.

Kathy must have felt his gaze because she glanced at up at him before she said, “You done? I think I am.”   
She hesitated before standing and handing over the piece of paper, Jamie swapped with her.   
There were many things Kathy wanted to try, apparently, including wearing a dress, which almost made him smile. What she had put down (other than wearing a dress) was surprisingly things he wouldn't have been opposed to. Most of the list comprised of food and activities such as 'play chess' and dancing.

Kathy pulled his attention from the long list with a laugh; one, he should note, that sounded almost childlike. Jamie raised his eyebrow at her with slight smirk, Kathy shook her head at him placed the paper on the coffee table on her way around his bed to sit on the other side of him. Jamie twisted so his back wasn't to her, as she mirrored him, “Your list is awfully short.” She commented.   
“Your list makes up for it.” Jamie stated with a shrug as he laid her list on the bed. It was easier to find things he wanted to do when Kathy had made one. Not only that but he had seriously not known what he could do.  
“Isn't there something you really want to do?” She asked, “I had this list in my head already.”  
Jamie shrugged again, “How long have you been out?”

Kathy shifted uncomfortably and he suspected it was because of the mention of Hydra. Even when he didn't out right say it, it still bothered her. “A year. You?”  
“Four months.”  
There was an awkward silence once again. Both obviously thinking about the horror they faced when they were with Hydra and the fear that accompanied them when they were on the run. Well, that's what Jamie assumed.  
“Dancing.” Was what Jamie found himself saying. It was on both of their lists and was something they could do right now.   
“What?” Kathy asked and blinked at him and he found her blue eyes focusing on him again. Her tiny figure curving inwards and arms wrapped tight around her body; the short strands of her fringe fell to shield the left side of her face and her nose scrunched up in confusion.  
She was hiding again, her walls only half up now but still, it frustrated him to no end when she did that. Though it would be hypercritical for him to say this as he had his walls up since they left the car; it just changed when they stepped outside that small bubble of comfort they had established in hours of sitting it the beat up, old thing.

“We could go dancing. There must be some place in this town where they have music.” He offered a smirk that was intended to be a comforting smile. Seemed to achieve the same outcome though, because Kathy nodded and stood.  
“Sounds like a plan. Lets do that.” she offered him a hand and Jamie felt rather proud when he only hesitated for a second.  
Kathy gave a small smile as she linked arms with him as if she had done so many times before, and strangely it felt natural to him.  
“Take me dancing, James.” she drawled with a smile.


	7. Not so sweet interlude

It seemed that dancing was all well and good thinking about, but actually doing so......was tricky. Unlike some operatives from Hydra, Katherine had not been taught the fine arts of infiltration; she was a deadly combination of brute force and cunning deaths. Give her a target and a pocket knife and she would be able to get rid of them and make it look like a suicide. Give her a business man to off and its done, but heaven forbid if you put her in a social situation.  
Ask her how to seduce and she could do a passable job, but only because she's been out in the world and imitating her way through each place she breezed through since her escape. Even a year wasn't enough to bring back social cues she should have been taught at birth.

So it should have been fairly evident that dancing -apparently even the easy kind- was not her forte.

  
It also would have had something to do with the thumping music of the club, not what she would have called danceable music; it was to much bass and the people she saw dancing wasn't dancing, it was more of a room full of horny teens who rubbed against each other in a semblance of animals in heat.  
Though, Jamie seemed to get this dancing and Katherine found it awe inspiring with how his body seemed to move so freely. He melted into the crowd with as much ease as his dancing.

Katherine had spent most of their night by the bar; she found that no matter how many drinks she ordered, it hardly touched her -the bartender tried so stop her drinks until she recited the alphabet backwards and vaguely threatened to do bodily harm – and she found that both a good and bad thing. Good because should they be attacked she would be ready, bad because she really wanted to get drunk in the hopes she'd have a dreamless, drunk sleep.  
Apparently that wasn't on the cards and, because she had two left feet, she was forced to glare at the dancers. Well not exactly forced but it made her feel better.  
Her first attempt at dancing failed when her feet decided to move in a box shape and her left hand had settled on Jamie's shoulder, while the right clasped his. At her try at dancing she could hear snigger over the music thanks to her super hearing, which ended Jamie's tutorial.

Now she watched like on one of her missions and growled occasionally at leering guys.

 

Jamie seemed to catch her dark look directed at yet another guy who leaned way to close to her; he didn't even have the decency to look her in the eyes, or pretend to at least, he was blatantly looking down her T shirt.

  
While they had found new clothes for Jamie, Katherine had proclaimed that what she was wearing was fine. So now he was clad in dark jeans and a black T shirt with that awful coat he had given Katherine before.  
Katherine silently called for back up with just a few pointed looks at Jamie then the guy, who had gotten close enough that the putrid stench of his breath fanned over her skin and almost made her gag.  
She knew she didn't need the support, but she would rather Jamie scare the guy off with his muscle and size, than punch a hole through the guys face. Now that she thought about it, she needed to cut down the violence.

“Having trouble?” Jamie asked with a growl as he slid in behind the short woman. The other guy took one look at the muscled super soldier and with a gulp, tucked tail and ran. Katherine gave a sigh and took another sip of her beer before deciding it was time to go. Dancing seemed more fun in her head.  
Katherine turned with a overly cheerful “Nope.” as she brushed past him, but stopped in her tracks when she caught sight of a very familiar face.  
She took a step back so as to hid her small form behind Jamie. Jamie must have picked up on her unease, because he tensed and immediately went into guard mode. “We need to move.” Katherine hissed like a spooked cat.

Right on the other side of the club was tall blond, Katherine would never forget; the woman still held herself with such arrogance. Her slim mouth turned up in a sneer that Katherine knew was companied by a cruel, deranged laugh; the woman's cool green eyes slide across the dance floor as if she were a looking for something, or maybe someone.

 

Jamie had reacted to Katherine's distress by slowly inching them towards the door in a way that wouldn't attract attention, however when they got close enough to the door the woman's eyes had almost landed on them. Katherine ended up darting out of the door as she pulled a heavy super soldier with her, her heart pounded at the realisation that HYDRA had caught up so soon.

Katherine started to walk, her hand still clenched in the sleeve of Jamie's coat when he suddenly yanked her back. She glared at him as she steadied herself with his arm, didn't he know they were in danger? Didn't he see the snake amongst the roses?  
“What's wrong?” Jamie whispered as he steered her towards an ally way. Katherine wouldn't wove her eyes from the club door, so transfixed by the black blot on an otherwise white background.  
“I generally like to know what I'm dealing with before it kills me.” Jamie snarked when the silence had stretched to long.  
Katherine blinked at the sudden sarcasm coming from the man she only associated with one worded answers and a monotone voice. It apparently shock him too if the frown was anything to go by.  
“HYDRA. They must have followed us.” Her heart had calmed it's frantic tempo as she explained their situation.  
It almost made her skin crawl to think that they were that close to her. Occupying the same town, the same space – she shivered- the same air.

 

As soon as the words left her mouth she began marching in the direction of their hotel.

Only to find a dark tendril of smoke curl up from behind the buildings in front of them, moments after an explosion rocked the ground. With a cuss in Russian, Katherine ducked back into the alley way, Jamie matched every step and with his large strides kept up with her.

 

“Where are you going, маленькая мышь?” Came the melodious voice.

 

Katherine stopped dead in her tracks and shared a look with Jamie, 'Run' she mouthed at him as he nodded.

But it was too late.

Electricity branched out from a spot on her left shoulder blade and caused her limbs to spasm as she fell. Dimly aware she was vulnerable and convulsing she watched as Jamie went for the woman's throat with his metal arm, only for it to be disabled by an EMP.

The burning pain soon stopped and the woman Katherine was so afraid of brought the Winter soldier to him knees with some well placed punches.

She smiled at Katherine as she smashed Jamie's head against the ground and effectively knocking him out.

 

“I have not said you could leave.” The woman snarled, her Russian accent thick with mirth despite the dangerous glint in her eye. “Night, night маленькая мышь.” she whispered before she smacked Katherine's against the floor and the world turned black, like the soul of her tormentor.

 

Unconscious Katherine dreamed of death.

Katherine dreamed of, her death.

 

Of fire.

 

Of fear.

 

Of panic.

 

Of pain.

 

Katherine dreamed of nothing but hell.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was meant to be a filler chapter but I thought you deserved more than that, that's why it took so long. Sorry
> 
>  
> 
> \- With love Huntress


End file.
